Chapter 5 CAN’T STOP THINKING ABOUT HIM

Ava's POV

I woke up in my own bed, confused for a second about how I got there. Then I remembered that Adrian had driven me home last night after everything that happened with Dominic.

My body was sore but not in a bad way. It was in a way that reminded me of every single thing he did to me.

I reached for my phone on the nightstand and the first thing I saw was my account balance of $53,847.00

I stared at the number until tears blurred my vision. It was rea, the money was actually there.

I dialed the hospital immediately.

"This is Ava Scott. My mother is Elena Scott and I want to authorize the treatment now. I have the money."

The nurse on the other end sounded relieved.

"That's wonderful news. We'll start this afternoon."

When I hung up, I just sat there crying as relief crashed over me in waves. My mother was going to live and she was actually going to get the treatment she needed.

But the price I paid...

I got out of bed and walked to the bathroom and my reflection in the mirror looked different somehow. It as the same face and same body, but somehow, something had changed.

I turned on the shower and let the hot water run over me. As I washed, I noticed the marks. It was the small bruises on my hips where his fingers had gripped me, a faint hickey on my neck, and another one on my inner thigh.

This was an evidence of what I had done and i should have felt ashamed, but I didn't.

Instead, I felt something else, it was like something I didn't want to name.

I finished showering and got dressed. I settled for a pair of jeans and a sweater that covered all the marks. Then I just stood in my tiny apartment, looking around. I really didn't have anywhere to go in the day.

My phone buzzed and it was Maya.

"Girl, where have you been? You disappeared last night and I was worried sick."

"I'm fine. Just tired. Went home early." I replied trying to ease her worries with a really cool voice.

"Did that rich guy bother you again? Dominic what's-his-name?"

My stomach flipped at his name.

"No. He just wanted drinks. That's all."

"Mm-hmm." Maya's tone said she didn't quite believe me.

"You sure that's all?"

"Yeah. I need to go visit my mom at the hospital. Can we talk later?"

"Fine. But you better not be hiding something from me."

"I'm not. Love you."

"Love you too, babe."

I hung up before she could ask more questions.

The guilt sat heavy in my chest as Maya was my best friend. I'd never lied to her before, but how could I tell her what I'd done? How could I explain that I'd slept with a stranger for money?

Even if that money saved my mother's life.

I grabbed my bag and keys, headed out to catch the bus to the hospital. My car was old and unreliable and half the time it didn't start.

On the bus, I kept thinking about him. The Dominic guy and the way he'd looked at me. Like I was the only person in the room, in the world.

The way he'd touched me. It was gentle at first, then not gentle at all, how huge his cock was and how they had settled in my tight pussy, like they were exactly made for me.

The way he had my boobs in his mouth and sucked on them with professionalism.

The way he'd said my name. Oh God

I pressed my thighs together, trying to ignore the ache building there again.

It was just one night, that's all it was supposed to be and I'd never see him again.

So why did that thought make my chest hurt?

At the hospital, I found my mom sitting up in bed and she looked better already.

"Ava!" She reached for my hand.

"The doctors told me. The treatment. How did you..."

"A loan came through." I lied as I gave her a faked smile.

"It came last minute and now, It's all taken care of, Mom. You just focus on getting better."

She studied my face for a long moment.

"You look different."

My heart stopped. "Different how?"

"I don't know. Lighter somehow. Like you're not carrying the weight of the world anymore." She said still looking deep into my eyes.

"That's because I'm not. You're going to be okay. That's all that matters."

We talked for over an hour. About her treatment schedule, anout what she wanted to do when she got out of the hospital and she said she wanted to go to the beach she hadn't been in ten years.

"I'll take you," I promised. "Anywhere you want."

When visiting hours ended, I kissed her goodbye and headed to the elevator. Maya was waiting in the lobby.

"I knew you'd be here." She handed me a coffee.

"You look exhausted."

"I'm fine."

"Stop saying that." She pulled me to a quiet corner.

"Talk to me. Really talk. How did you get the money for your mom's treatment?"

I couldn't meet her eyes.

"I told you. A loan."

"Bullshit, Ava. No loan comes through that fast. And you've been trying for months." She grabbed my hands.

"What did you do?" She asked and the words stuck in my throat.

"Oh my God." Maya's voice dropped to a whisper. "The rich guy. Dominic Hayes. Did he..did you..."

I nodded as rears burned my eyes but I blinked them back

"He paid you?"

"Yes, fifty thousand dollars. For one night."

Maya was quiet before she pulled me into a hug.

"Hey. Don't cry. You did what you had to do." She patted my back gently

"I'm not crying because I regret it." I pulled back.

"I'm crying because I don't. Maya, I liked it. I wanted him. And now I can't stop thinking about him." I told her the truth.

"Have you seen him since?"

"No. It was just supposed to be one night. That was the deal."

"Do you want to see him again?"

I nodded, ashamed.

"Then that's okay. There's nothing wrong with that."

"He paid me for sex, Maya. That makes me..."

"That makes you someone who saved her mother's life." Maya squeezed my hands.

"Listen to me. You're not a bad person. You're not dirty or used or any of those things you're thinking. You made a choice and it was a hard one. But it was your choice." She assured me.

"Then why do I feel so guilty?"

"Because you're human." She smiled sadly.

"But Ava, be careful. Men like Dominic Hayes... they're dangerous. Not because they're cruel, but because they make you want things you shouldn't want."

"I know."

"Do you? Because you've got that look in your eyes already."

"What look?"

"Like you're falling for him."

"I'm not. I barely know him."

"Then why can't you stop thinking about him?"she asked and I didn't have an answer. I just stared blankly at her.

We left the hospital together and Maya walked me to the bus stop.

"Just promise me you'll be smart," she said.

"If you see him again, protect your heart."

"I will. I promise."

But as the bus pulled away, I knew I was lying again. Because my heart already felt different when I thought about him.

That night, alone in my apartment, I couldn't sleep.

I kept replaying everything and just as I was,I found my hands slipping under the duvet and meeting with my already wet panties. I rubbed the surface gently and a moan escaped from my lips.

I quickly pulled off my panties and slipped my finger into it, I went on and on, and when that was not enough, I added another finger, increasing the pace.

"Oh, Dominic" I whispered, and didn't even realize.

Oh, fuck! It was just a night but I didn't believe it anymore.

Somewhere in the city, I wondered if he was thinking about me too.