Putting Up Walls

Gray

Mark is still in his meeting as he said at the end of the day, so I pack up my things. I contemplate what I should do as I walk toward the web design department to find Sam. Part of me wants to see Mark tonight, but the logical part of me knows I need to protect myself and his friendship.

“I’m glad to see you.” Sam smiles at me gorgeously. He walks in step with me.

“Mr.Stern is in a meeting, so there wasn’t anything much left to do. He doesn’t want me to leave, but I won’t be coming back tomorrow.” I say.

“He is losing someone great, but you have to do what you feel is right..”

“I don’t want to go back home to an empty house, I have a lot on my mind.” I sigh.

“Well, we can go watch a movie tonight, if you want?” he asks.

“That sounds great,” I say.

“We can meet there, or I can get you at your house?” he says as we reach the parking lot.

“I will meet you there, in case I want to go somewhere else after the movie, I shrug.

“Great, see you tonight,” he says as he walks away.

Now that my plans are sorted for tonight, I can avoid seeing Mark. I head home to change into something comfortable. My phone rings as I enter the house. I pick it up, hoping it’s not Mark. “Hey, Dad,” I say cheerfully and walk into the lounge.

“Hey kiddo, how are you? How are things at home and work? Mark treating you well?” he asks. No, Mark hasn’t treated me well, I think, sitting down on the sofa.

“I’m okay, things at home are good. Mark is treating me okay.” I lie, I don’t want him to know what happened. “I decided to try something new. I want to start my own web design business. When you are back home, can you help me with everything that is needed?” I ask.

“Honey, that is wonderful, but you know that with me being away on business, I hardly get to see you. So instead of waiting for me, why don’t you ask Mark to help you? I’m sure that he won’t mind,” that is not what I wanted to hear. I don’t even want Mark to be involved in my business.

“I want your help, Dad, not Mark’s,” I say with a heavy sigh.

“Mark won’t mind, honey. I can explain these things to him, set up a meeting, and discuss everything that you would like to discuss. Mark knows more about running a business and everything it takes to keep it running. Just ask him, and you won’t go wrong with him. He is the best at what he does,” he tries to encourage me.

“I will think about it,” I say. I don’t feel confident going to Mark with this. There is a knock on the door. “Someone is at the door, I will call you later,” I say.

“I love you, honey,” my dad says as I get up from the sofa and place my bag on the coffee table.

“I love you, too, Dad.” I hang up and place my phone gently next to my bag.

I go to the door and I open it, finding Mark standing there staring at me with hunger. I am glued to my spot, shocked. It’s like everything in my mind that puts up defenses stops at that moment. He moves closer, grabs me, and kisses me aggressively, his hand is cupping the back of my head, and his other hand is around my waist, my hands pressed against his chest. He walks me backward, kicking the door shut behind us. My back finds the wall, and he takes advantage of my gasp, tasting the inside of my mouth with his tongue. I try to push him away to get more air, but he senses it and pulls away only inches from my face, we are both panting.

“Don’t leave,” he whispers.

“I can’t work for you,” I say, looking at his lips.

“Is this what you want?” he looks at me with desperation in his eyes. “You want this. Please stay,” he begs.

“You’re only doing this for work purposes. You want me to work for you, you don’t want me!.” I say, and I push him further away, I walk to the kitchen, and he follows me. I stop at the sink and I turn around to see him standing on the other side of the kitchen counter. “I can’t work for you,” I say, and he looks crushed.

“Gray, I need you,” he says desperately.

“What do you need me for?”

“I need you…You, Gray,” he says.

I lick my lips as I try to think clearly. “By needing me, what do you mean by that?” I brace myself for the answer that I don’t want to hear.

“I need you, I want you. Most importantly, I need you to continue to work with me,” he says, and I scoff, tears starting to blur my vision.

“I think you should leave, I have plans,” I say, trying to keep it together because clearly, I was right, he needs me more for work. I walk back to the lounge to get my bag and phone.

“Where are you going?” he asks me as if I belong to him. He looks angry with his jaw clenching.

“Out! with a friend,” I say as I put my bag strap over my shoulder, and I keep my phone in my hand. I just need to get away from Mark.

“What friend?”

“Sam,” I say as I walk past him towards the door.

“Fuck Sam, stay here with me,” he says.

I turn around to face him. “Fuck Sam? He is my friend, and I don’t know what your problem is with Sam.” I say, scowling at him.

“I don’t like him, especially since he is always bothering you at work.” he runs a hand through his hair.

“I have plans with him tonight, and I can’t cancel them.” I open the door.

“I will go with you,” he says.

“No, there is a non-fraternization policy in place. Sam will see you with us, and he doesn’t even know that you are a family friend. Jackie is also looking suspiciously at us after what happened today. If you implemented that policy, then it’s on you. I’m leaving now.” I say as I stand by the door, waiting for him to leave.

When I look at him, he looks angry and crushed all at once. He walks to the door and stops beside me. “At least message me when you get back home, so I know you’re safe,” he says, looking at me.

“Okay,” I say impatiently. He walks out, and I notice it’s begun to rain. I’m still in my work clothes, Mark showed up before I was able to change into something more comfortable. I sigh, although my heartache is sitting heavy in my chest. I lock the door and walk to my car as Mark drives away.

Tonight I plan to forget about him and enjoy the movie with Sam. Mark will not see me tomorrow at work because I’m officially done at Sternpoint.