Chapter 8

The openness and vulnerability that was in his eyes was fleeting and he pulled away abruptly before he stood completely. I must be going back. I will have Sisser accompany you home so that you may rest up.” I nodded in response feasting my eyes on him as he walked away without looking for an agreement or rebuttal.

Once I was home, I crawled into bed thinking of Leon’s words to me. “Mmm!” I groaned onto my pillow thinking of him. My fingers flirted with my pussy lips again underneath my panties.

Frustratedly I pushed my panties off my hips just as I heard a tap on the door.

“Come in!” I huffed mindlessly as I continued ripping the offending fabric from my body.

My panties sailed through the air and landed on the man who had come into my room, Alistair. Alistair was my personal bodyguard and companion. He had brought me a cup of milk

I did not care if he saw what I was doing. Probably because I had gotten a little drunk at the casino.

I could see the tortured look on Alistair’s face. I knew he viewed me as a temptation whether I was doing it intentionally or not. He set the glass on the nightstand beside me. I picked up the milk and lazily ordered him: "Help me get a clean one from the drawer."

Alistair did as he was told and couldn't help but peek at my lower body while I sat drinking milk.

I caught him immediately. "Why do you always look at me like this, Alistair? Do you like me?" I leaned my head on her elbow and asked him directly. I kept an innocent look on my face, but my tone was low like that of a dangerous slut.

The honest man who came from a military background nodded subconsciously.

"Then do you want to fuck me?" I asked lightly again.

Alistair nodded honestly again and shook his head when he heard my laughter.

"Who is prettier, me or my mother?" I raised my lips and challenged. I knew that Alistair had always looked at my mother with admiration. I lifted Alistair's chin with my toes, "Look at me, Alistair."

Alistair suddenly gripped my ankle harshly causing me to cry out. He didn’t respond to my anguish but wordlessly pushed me down on the bed. I screamed, but he pressed his lips against mine regardless.

I realized he would not stop, so I used my awareness and slammed the glass cup into the side of his head. The severity of pain in his head made Alistair calm down all of a sudden, and he ran out of the door.

I pulled my knees to my chest thinking of everything that had happened. My chest heaved up in down in fear. “I went too far tonight,” I thought to myself.

Who would have thought that Alistair of all people would do something like that? He seemed so kind and although he was tall, he was thin, so I never imagined it. It just proved that I would have to be even more careful and never let my guard down.

I rocked back and forth hugging myself as the familiarity of fear sat with me. Immediately following it, was the intense need for sex, as was my condition with the addiction. It was my body’s physiological response to hard situations.

The more shameful, the more excited, and the more excited, the more shameful. This vicious cycle has been tormenting me since the night I was violated, my eighteenth birthday, and I still don't know who the culprit is and where he is. If I ever get the chance, I will definitely kill him with my own hands.

I did want comfort. I closed my eyes allowing my mind to wonder in search of Leon. He might appear cold and callous being a Don and all, but to me he was always sensitive if I seemed hurt even if he did keep a frown on his handsome face.

I missed him terribly and felt my fingers drifting down my abdomen in seeking to alleviate myself of the loneliness and pressing feelings for him. Just then I heard a car arrive.

I peeked out of my window and saw Leon getting out being supported on both sides by a bodyguard. He appeared to be drunk.

After the noise downstairs quieted down, I tiptoed down the stairs. I ambled slowly to the door of the study room Leon often entered privately. The light was dim, with only a desk lamp on the table to illuminate the shadows.

Leon lay on his back on the leather sofa, his eyes closed, as if he was asleep.

I held my breath. An invisible magnetic field lured me into the door, and my heartbeat thundered a crazy and noisy cadence in my eardrums, making me unable to hear my overly rapid breathing.

I clutched the thin blanket wrapped around my body and approached Leon quietly.

Tentatively I questioned, "Dad?"

The handsome man seemed to be really drunk, with no sign of waking up. A sense of excitement gnawed on my nerves. I supported my weight on the handle of the leather chair and observed my stepfather closely.

My pink lips fell slightly open poised as if I wanted to utter a gentle whisper in the next moment. I longed to taste the taste of love. I wanted to feel the man that I loved skin against mine. Slowly, little by little, I approached my stepfather's face. My breathing was shallow, disordered and uncontrolled as I brought my lips within an inch of his. I was so nervous. Finally, my lips touched a soft and wet object.